Episode 45

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Published on:

21st Sep 2020

Practicing authenticity and radical acceptance with Tara Blair Ball

A lot of philosophy and psychology says that if you want someone else to change, you should first begin with yourself. There’s a great deal of wisdom and insight into us beginning with ourselves, but ultimately we don’t just know ourselves in a vacuum, we have to enter into community, into relationships.

At the same time, there’s a lot of self-improvement ideologies that say we shouldn’t listen to others because it’s always about them. How can we discern the difference between when we should listen to ourselves and when we should listen to the feedback of others? 

Tara Blair Ball opens up about what went wrong in her first marriage, how challenging it was to be so vulnerable in writing about it in her memoir, The Beginning of the End.

She discusses how to get out of a toxic relationship, and gives her best advice for personal growth and the development of self-knowledge. She also offers a course on how to break free from your own toxicity.

Time Stamps:

2:24 the interplay between instinct and instruction in relationships

7:22 Tara shares her experience about finding herself in a toxic relationship, how she handled the situation and how she grew to take radical responsibility for her choices. 

13:05 we identify a toxic person in a relationship but ignore the fact that healthy people do not date and stay with unhealthy people 

13:38 unhealthy people and their behaviors are more likely to drag us down, then we are to bring them up. 

17:40 the 4 step process -awareness, acceptance, action and application 

22:02 it has to be a balance between recognizing our own self awareness and what we need while also taking into account what we get from others

23:52 Solomon’s paradox

27:39 dealing with grief in the process 

30:27 a big part of being able to change a story is to acknowledge that we have the power to write it to being with

34:42 the practices that keep you connected to yourself 

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About the Podcast

The Big Self Podcast
Inner Growth. Outer impact.
Shelley and Chad kick off each week with a provocative thought leader who has something to say about the power of inner growth to drive outer impact. From building resilience to life design to life transitions to leadership to growing ourselves up, we touch on all things Big Self. At the back end of the week Chad and Shelley dish on their experiences and expertise.

About your host

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Chad Prevost

Dr. Chad has advanced degrees in creative writing, literature, and theology. Being married to a psychotherapist has been another education. A workshop leader and entrepreneur, he has started and participated in writing and literary arts communities in New York, Austin, Atlanta and Chattanooga. He also has experience writing as a journalist for startups in tech and logistics. He is the author of several books of poetry, as well as interactive-fiction for youth. Over the years, he has innovated writing processes to foster reflection and insight, narrative strength, and authentic voice.